03 February 2016

I Once Fall But Rise Up Again (Part 1)

Hi all, 
This would my first post in 2016. So many things happened lately that i haven’t update here for so long since October last year. I went silent to keep myself some space and to reflect all the things that happened in my life. I am grateful that God has granted me strength to face that difficult moments. And to my husband who always been there through my dark time, and to my little boy, Gabriel. He is the pillar of my life. 

I was deep in sorrow. We have lost a baby girl in June 4th 2015. My life has been upside down since then. I questioned God over and over again, the universe, the surrounding, why this had to happened to me? Why me?.. The questions remain unanswered until the very end of the year 2015 in which i climbed up again after i fell down to the lowest point of my life. I shut all things including social medias, I refused to communicate with anyone, i shed tears for 3 days, weeks and months. Until at some point, postpartum depression attacked me. 

In the meantime, we were so busy to move to Ranau. My husband has been sent to work station in Ranau, so Gabriel and I followed him. So, there in Ranau I remain silent, trying to calm myself, praying everyday so that God granted me huge strength to face the coming days.

The year 2015 was the toughest year for us. We've been through couple of sadness moments and a little out of track in our financial. 

However, above all that, Prayer is the most powerful thing to do. I can see that God is working in my life, in our life. That God never leaves me, He walks with me and teaches me about the strength that once hidden in me. It reveals like never before and to remind me there are 2 Angels up there watching over me, my husband and Gabriel.


  1. Gugur ke stel? Takziah. Semoga diberikan ketabahan untuk mengharungi ujian ini.

  2. I'm really sorry to hear that, Stella. Stay strong and take care always.

  3. Hi stella, sorry to know about this, tercari2 juga Ko masa Tu... hugs


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